Stockwell Toilet Watch

MISSING PERSON ALERT - PART 2

Councillor BOWYER, believed to be somehow connected to STOCKWELL WARD remains on the missing list despite our 13 February ALERT. KILROY isn't especially surprised – anyway the search for him goes on. He has been spotted - but from a while back in unflattering photo plus light on the knocker on another local STOCKWELL BLOG. You'd think “tyreless4toilets” BOWYER would be dancing in the STOCKWELL streets after winning KILROYs “STOCKWELL TOILET WATCH 2007 ANNUAL AWARD”.

The new alert absentee went part-missing from the very off but re-surfaced a little when KIlROYs keeper hit up RICHARD GODFREY Lambeth Council's “Corporate information” handler – he has generally been helpful, 'Twas GODFREY earlier this year who provided information on the part missing mysterious CECILIE KROHN who up to that point had remained somewhat anonymous. Unfortunately Cecilie has gone missing yet again hence this ALERT. Has anyone seen CECILIE KROHN?

A little more background might help enquiries. Richard Godfrey kindly offered that Cecilie is DEVELOPMENT and COMMUNICATIONS MANAGER for Lambeth Council's STREET CARE DEPARTMENT. Generally speaking it's a touch curious for managers of “development and communications” to go missing. Anyway Cecilie has gone to ground. Altho there is a strong rumour that she has passed Kate Hoey by and is somehow enmeshed in the coat tails of LEGAL and DEMOCRATIC SERVICES sometimes signed for by MARK HYNES.

It wouldn't that much matter to KILROY whether Cecilie was missing or not if (1) STOCKWELL had public loos and (2) Cecilie had responded to a number of pertinent pubic loos questions that have arisen from the Council 28 January PUBLIC CONVENIENCES report to CABINET. 'course it may be that Cecilie doesn't want to answer the questions and is hoping that somehow the head of LEGAL and DEMOCRATIC SERVICES will get her off the hook by declaring KILROYs keeper to be unclean unclean.

The CABINET local bogs stroke pissoirs report had statistics for the numbers of piddlers who had used "3 weeks only" trial period pissoirs. And also for the amounts of piddle that had been donated. So Cecilie has been asked to clarify how the surprise surprise stat's got drawn up. She was also asked to clarify how her report met a primary recommendation as set out in the March 2006 Greater London Authority “AN URGENT NEED” public toilets provision report which was that pro-rata public toilet provision for women ought to be double that of men. Cecilie's report had stated that Lambeth IS adhering to the GLA recommendations when to KILROY it appears NOT to be so doing – hence the enquiry.

And then there is the vexed issue of past toilet closures. The Cecilie report seems a little transient and camouflaged on this issue (as this blogg has before mentioned). It kinda states that er .... things ... er .... went into decline .... er ..... and closures ... er ...occurred ... er ... in the past decade and .... er ...more specifically ... in 2003. Which may be or may not be a strange claim 'cos STOCKWELL along with 4 other local public conveniences actually got it in the neck twenty years ago this coming September. So Cecilie has been asked to identify which circa 2003 toilet closures she had actually had in mind. Can you understand a departmental DEVELOPMENT and "COMMUNICATIONS" manager going missing when faced by enquiries such as the above? Probably not.

Anyway has anybody seen CECILIE KROHN? Maybe she's sneaked off to panama in a canoe. Please help – her family may also be worried about her.

Still to come - maybe tomorow - a peep up the local Lib Dems pants, local library closures and PARIS MAY 1968 - those naughty naughty students how they chalked on the pavements and the lead up to Blair's illegal Irak WAR.

posted by Ian Cameron aka KILROY WAS-A-HERO @ 02:04